


All's Fair... (2011)

by JennyB



Series: Lent 2011 [4]
Category: Saiyuki Gaiden
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Lent Challenge 2011, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-12
Updated: 2011-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-06 15:02:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1108249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JennyB/pseuds/JennyB
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A furious Konzen has been waiting a long time for Tenpou to return. Unfortunately, staying angry with Tenpou isn't as easy as he'd like it to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All's Fair... (2011)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [laurose8](https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurose8/gifts).



> Written for Lent Challenge 2011. Prompt: Young people finding they're in serious, permanent love.
> 
> I tried a different approach with this one, and I hope it works. The slight...choppiness you might feel when reading was deliberate, to simulate a more juvenile approach.

Konzen is beyond angry as he prowls his rooms, cursing the day he ever met Tenpou. He knows that he's not being fair, and he tries to ignore the chiding from the soft, Tenpou-like voice of his conscience. Tenpou is a Captain in the Heavenly Army, and in charge of a company of soldiers. It's a rare position for one so young to have attained, but Tenpou is a prodigy of sorts, and he's caught the eye of the upper echelon. Konzen knows that Tenpou didn't ask to be sent to the Lower World on a campaign of indeterminate length - it's been six months thus far. He also knows that Tenpou doesn't follow blindly or believe his superiors' reasons behind his orders. He knows that Tenpou has a plan, and that in working his way up the chain of command, it will ensure that he _won't_ have to leave as often to fight in battles he couldn't care less about. Despite knowing this, Konzen resents Tenpou for leaving him alone in the Heavens with no way to contact him. For Konzen, this is Hell.

His Auntie tells him that this is a part of growing up. Of changing and maturing. Konzen doesn't care. Right now, he still wants to be childish and selfish, and for someone to tell him he's justified. And so, he holds his anger like the desperate clutch of a drowning man. He needs this. If he isn't angry, he's going to fall into the melancholy that threatens. And if that happens, then he will have to acknowledge that, yes, he misses Tenpou more than anything, and that he really does love him. Tenpou - the idiot boy genius with the wild, chocolate hair and beautiful green eyes who will give him kisses he currently longs to feel on his cheeks, his eyelids, his lips. But he doesn't love Tenpou. If Konzen did, then surely he would understand and he wouldn't be hurt and angry. And he wouldn't be thinking non-stop about how much he _doesn't_ love Tenpou. He doesn't love anyone because being in love makes his heart ache.

Konzen continues arguing infinite circles in his mind, and he's tired, but he doesn't dare stop. He needs to stay focused on how much he hates Tenpou. He's only able to break the perpetual cycle when he hears a knock on his door, and he stomps over to answer it. Pastel silks flutter soundlessly behind him in much like the listless twitch of an angry cat's tail. He opens the door, and when he meets sharp viridian eyes, his breath catches and he forgets to be angry for a moment. He tells himself that it's only because he's angry that he doesn't run his fingers through messy chocolate tresses, and not because he's afraid that if he touches Tenpou, he'll shatter the illusion and Tenpou will be gone.

After a moment, he notes the changes in Tenpou's uniform. He's been promoted twice since leaving and is now a Lieutenant Colonel, and judging from the command badge he wears, he's been given a battalion to lead. It's a step closer, just as Tenpou had promised, but Konzen just scowls as he stares stonily at the young officer in his doorway. "Finished your business in the Lower World, _Colonel_?" he spits, and he tells himself he's glad when he sees surprise, then hurt, flash briefly across Tenpou's face. He knows he's being juvenile, but he doesn't care. Konzen figures all adolescents are immature from time to time. And he's entitled. "I knew it was stupid to get involved with a soldier. With _you_." His anger fuels his actions. He believes that if he hurts Tenpou, he'll leave, and then Konzen won't have to acknowledge his own feelings. "There's too much uncertainty. Too much risk." Konzen narrows his eyes and strikes what he hopes will be the final blow. "Too much bother."

Konzen stops then, still glowering, and he waits for Tenpou to turn and leave as he'd predicted. Konzen finds he's at odds with himself. Part of him looks forward to the smug satisfaction of proving himself right - the _I told you so_ \- and yet, he's deathly afraid he's gone too far. For a second his anger ebbs, and panic over losing Tenpou urges him to apologize, but his pride won't allow him to. So he stands silently, almost defiantly, and he waits.

Tenpou stares in disbelief at Konzen for a long time, but he doesn't leave. In that moment, he looks like the boy of seventeen and not the brilliant military strategist. He drops his gaze to obscure his eyes. Konzen knows Tenpou does this when he's working through his emotions. Konzen also knows from Tenpou's posture that his words had hurt. Konzen tells himself he's glad, even if his conviction is rather half-hearted. Finally, Tenpou clears his throat softly, and says, "You're absolutely right. But risk can also bring great rewards. Nothing great ever happened by playing it safe."

Konzen frowns slightly when Tenpou reaches into his satchel and withdraws a small bouquet of deep purple flowers nestled among crinkled dark green leaves. He catches the faint scent of vanilla and cherry in the air, and he wonders what sort of plant this is that has such a comforting fragrance. He also wonders where Tenpou acquired it; he's never seen such a thing in the Jade Emperor's gardens.

"It's called heliotrope," Tenpou tells him. "It grows in the Lower World. I know it's forbidden to bring things back to the Heavens, but I'd risk a dishonourable discharge to give it to you. The colour reminds me of your eyes, and why I'm doing this. According to texts, this flower symbolizes eternal love; I felt it was appropriate."

Konzen's anger vanishes in an instant, and he pulls Tenpou to him. As they kiss, Konzen realizes that the green of the leaves remind him of Tenpou, and that he loves him, too.

Eternally.


End file.
